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Monday, February 24, 2014

UDP is the Chuck Norris of protocols.

Gilded on reddit: (not mine, alas)

I'll defend UDP.

  • UDP is the honey badger of the internet protocol suite.
  • UDP is all about the transaction. UDP is standing on a cliff yelling, "Come at me, bro", whether you're there or not.
  • UDP is a man's protocol doing real shit like bootstrapping your ass and slapping an IP on you. Get up, motha fucka!
  • UDP will talk shit to one of you or all of you. UDP ain't scared. UDP brought the fear.
  • UDP understands that you may be slow sometimes. So UDP will wait for your sorry ass. UDP grew up without a father, too.
  • UDP sends a message and couldn't give a fuck if you got it or not.
  • UDP got a message from you saying that you got his messages and guess what? UDP didn't even open it! Not one fuck given.
  • Don't try to shake UDP's hand! You crazy?
And, when UDP dies because you weren't available, UDP doesn't shed a tear. UDP is hardcore. He's going out even if he knows you ain't there. UDP is a goddam one-man slaughter house.
Because UDP doesn't give a fuck.

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